I’M MARRIED, HAVE 4 KIDS, AND RUN A BUSINESS FROM HOME. THESE 12 WEEKLY HABITS SAVED MY MENTAL HEALTH

I'm married, a father of four, and a business owner. Here are the things that keep me sane.

Running a business and working from home--with kids: It's a topic I speak about often with my friends. It seems that most of the business owner "influencers" you find online nowadays are in their 20s or early 30s, many of them without children of their own. So, we started forming our own communities, just to chat and exchange advice.

After all, no one tells you how to manage business responsibilities when your kids get sick. Or, when you work from home with small children. Or, when things aren't going well--with the family or the business--but you have to keep pushing forward. (More on how my wife and I handle childcare at the end of this article.)

I won't pretend I've figured it out. Like everyone, I have good days and bad days. (And good and bad months, too.) But over the years, I've developed a series of habits that not only help me run my business and personal life more effectively, they've saved my mental health.

Here are 12 habits I try to live by. Maybe you'll find something useful for you, too. (If you find value in this lesson, you might be interested in my free course, which teaches you how to build emotional intelligence at work and home.)

Exercise

In spring and summer, I like to exercise in the mornings. In fall and winter, later in the day.

Why I do it: Health is priority. My wife always reminds me of the proverb, "A live dog is better off than a dead lion."

Talk with the kids

Some days are more rushed than others, but almost every day I try to spend 10 to 15 minutes with my kids before they head off to school.

Why I do it: The time may be short, but it goes a long way in keeping us connected, and allows me to give them needed guidance in a turbulent world.

Coffee

Not just coffee. Good coffee.

Why I do it: Self-explanatory.

A conversation with my wife

It can be difficult having an adult conversation with young children in the house. So, after getting the kids off to school, I try to spend 20 to 30 minutes talking with my wife.

Why I do it: It keeps us connected--and helps us recalibrate plans for the day and the rest of the week.

Go for a 'sunlight' walk

I learned this one from neuroscientist Andrew Huberman, who swears by the practice of taking in direct sunlight every morning. I take 15 to 20 minutes to walk outside and get the benefits from the sun.

Why I do it: Even if the sky is overcast, 10 to 20 minutes can make a world of difference in maintaining energy throughout the day, and sleeping better at night.

Personal time

Next, I take about a half hour for "deliberate learning."

For me, that means a prayer, Bible reading and reflection, and making personal notes. Then, later that morning or afternoon, I take another half hour to try to learn something new.

Why I do it: An hour a day becomes five hours a week of deliberate learning--also known as the five-hour rule: It helps me sustain the habit of learning, progressing, and growing. (You can read more about the benefits of the five-hour rule here.)

Stay hydrated

To ensure I get enough water, I keep a one-liter carafe on my desk. My goal is to get through it twice.

Why I do it: A couple of years ago, I had a terrible bout with a kidney stone. Ever since, I make staying hydrated throughout the day a major priority.

Deep work

For me, the mornings are the best time for deep, concentrated work. So I have a strict "no meeting" rule for most mornings.

Why I do it: Keeping mornings for deep work and reducing interruptions allows me to focus on longer tasks and complex projects. This greatly boosts my productivity.

A true lunch hour

I always try to take at least an hour break, often more like an hour and a half to two hours. In addition to lunch with my wife and the smaller kids (who aren't in school), I try to do something I enjoy: read, play chess, watch YouTube).

Why I do it: A longer break allows me to recharge and gives me valuable time with my wife. When time's up, I'm actually motivated to be productive again.

Limited meetings and buffer time

Of course, I can't avoid meetings altogether--but I do try to avoid unnecessary meetings. I also limit the amount of times I meet per day (afternoons only, see previous point). And if I have to take more than one meeting, I make sure to schedule buffer time in between.

Why I do it: Since I'm an introvert, I need significant time to recover from meetings.

Family time

Evenings are family time. I try to have a hard stop, so I can spend some time with the kids. Once they're in bed, I might come back to my desk to finish something up...but only if necessary.

Most of the time, though, I try to stick to that cutoff time, and enjoy the rest of the evening with my wife.

Why I do it: Because I believe true quality time is only possible with quantity time.

Weekends start on Friday

One of the best decisions I ever made was to switch to a (mostly) four-day work week--meaning Fridays are family days.

Why I do it: Having that extra day makes all the difference in being able to do little errands and tasks that my wife and I haven't managed during the week, to have a nice breakfast, and to just to catch our breath.

To be honest, not every day and week look like this. But most of them do. And while I'm still figuring out how to balance everything, these habits have definitely gone a long way in saving my own mental health.

The value of a great partner

I'm fortunate that my wife is an amazing business partner and teammate: She's my key advisor in both the business and life. She also made the decision to be a stay-at-home mom so she could be there for the kids as much as possible.

At the same time, we split many of the household and childcare duties: I'm a husband and dad first, business owner second. This helps me prioritize: When the kids are off for vacation or home sick, I often have to work in the evening once they're in bed, or sometimes on the weekend. And sometimes, deadlines simply need to get pushed.

When that happens, I remind myself this is one reason I chose to work for myself: to be more flexible, spend more time with family, and choose my own working hours. Also, that pushing my own deadlines by a week or two, while grating on my nerves and causing all sorts of negative emotions, will make relatively little difference in the big picture. (I use the "golden question" to help me with this: How will I feel about this in 5 weeks/months/years?)

Because running a business is hard, and so is running a family--both together with my wife. But having the freedom to set your own schedule and do things on your terms is an enormous privilege, and one that I'm extremely thankful for.

This post originally appeared at inc.com.

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